UseQuote.com

How come we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.

The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.

Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody.

Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform.

It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not to deserve them.

There is something fascinating about science. One gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact.

Of the delights of this world man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.